Sunday, 9 August 2015

The Similarity Between Death and Betrayal

In the HOUSE MD Series, Doctor Gregory House, in one episode like that made reference to the 5 Stages Of Grief and Grieving.
Out of curiosity, i did a little research...and i came across the Kübler-Ross postulate, a series of emotional stages experienced by survivors of an intimate's death. The five stages are Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression and Acceptance, popularly recalled by the acronym DABDA. This model was first introduced by Swiss psychiatrist Elisabeth Kübler-Ross in her 1969 book, 'Death and Dying', and was inspired by her work with terminally ill patients.

Kübler-Ross noted that the stages are not a complete list of all possible emotions, and can occur in any order, and that not everyone who experiences a life-threatening or life-altering event feels all five of the responses.

The Stages...

1. Denial — One of the first reactions is denial, wherein the survivor imagines a false, preferable reality.

2. Anger — When the individual recognizes that denial cannot continue, (s)he becomes frustrated. Certain psychological responses of a person undergoing this phase would be: "Why me? It's not fair!"; "How can this happen to me?"; '"Who is to blame?"; "Why would God let this happen?".

3. Bargaining — The third stage involves the hope that the individual can avoid a cause of grief. Usually, the negotiation for an extended life is made with a higher power in exchange for a reformed lifestyle. Other times, they will use anything valuable against another human agency to extend or prolong the life. People facing less serious trauma can bargain or seek compromise.

4. Depression — "I'm so sad, why bother with anything?"; "I'm going to die soon so what's the point?"; "I miss my loved one, why go on?"
During the fourth stage, the individual becomes saddened by the certainty of death. In this state, the individual may become silent, refuse visitors and spend much of the time mournful and sullen.

5. Acceptance — "It's going to be okay."; "I can't fight it, I may as well prepare for it."

In this last stage, individuals embrace mortality or inevitable future, or that of a loved one, or other tragic event. People dying may precede the survivors in this state, which typically comes with a calm, retrospective view for the individual, and a stable condition of emotions.


Well just recently, I got betrayed by someone close...chai!!!
***wait, lemme wipe mi tears.

Okay, now I'm not gonna go into details here, But it is sort of like that moment where someone you trust(ed) sells OR gives out your soul idea to another party. And this party brings it into realization...before you kick it off.
The evidence was damn clear. It was obvious. My other colleagues and partners knew this.

 I even got this message below:

That was when it hit me....
The Grief of the DEATH of a Loved One is like a BETRAYAL by a Trusted one. In most cases, you tend to go through the same other cases, you skip one.
In most cases, people go through the stages pretty fast and GET OVER IT, in other cases, people stay in one stage for too long.
And that's where the problem often lies.

MY AdVICe...

Being hurt by someone close is pratically inevitable. Hence, Get through the stages fast...and MOVE ON.

Victory 'I was dead but now i Live' Anosike.

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